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246
kather*ne (137)
247
Bart (137)
248
SmokestackJones (135)
suffers delusions of adequacy
Reviews by 'Bart'
Current status of
Movie guru
with a total of
137
reviews published to date.
Order by
Film Name
Review Votes
Review Score
Chronological Order
Show
All
Lost Boys, The (1987)
Bill S. Preston, Vampire.
Nov 27, 2003
Scored 4/5
Vote
(20)
Memento (2000)
.elbattegrofnU
Aug 8, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(18)
Dune (1984)
'Tremors' with a budget.
Aug 6, 2003
Scored 4/5
Vote
(12)
Y Tu Mam� Tambi�n (2001)
'American Paella'.
Aug 9, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(12)
Adventures Of Priscilla, Queen Of The Desert, The (1994)
Gay Pearce, Terence Camp.
Oct 3, 2003
Scored 4/5
Vote
(11)
Top Gun (1986)
Ego cleared for take-off.
Nov 25, 2003
Scored 2/5
Vote
(10)
Matrix Reloaded, The (2003)
Trinity uploads Neo's hardware.
Aug 6, 2003
Scored 4/5
Vote
(9)
Young Guns (1988)
'The Mild Bunch'.
Nov 25, 2003
Scored 2/5
Vote
(9)
Knight's Tale, A (2001)
Moron ignores hot blacksmith.
Oct 3, 2003
Scored 3/5
Vote
(8)
Dogma (1999)
God gives stoner boner.
Oct 2, 2003
Scored 4/5
Vote
(7)
One Million Years B.C. (1966)
The cleavage time forgot.
Aug 6, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(7)
Outland (1981)
'Sci-Fi Noon'.
Oct 4, 2003
Scored 2/5
Vote
(6)
Pi (1998)
If Lynch studied algebra...
Aug 7, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(6)
American Psycho (2000)
Genesis fan: obviously psychotic.
Aug 7, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(5)
American Werewolf In London, An (1981)
Werewolf, corpse watch porn.
Oct 2, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(5)
Batman (1966)
Male corset saves day.
Aug 5, 2003
Scored 4/5
Vote
(5)
Deep Blue Sea (1999)
Saffron's underwear: Great. White.
Aug 7, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(5)
Groundhog Day (1993)
Comedy withstands repeated viewing.
Oct 2, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(5)
Muppets From Space (1999)
Piggy tries Gonzo journalism.
Aug 8, 2003
Scored 4/5
Vote
(5)
Piano, The (1993)
Keitel's pianist exposed.
Aug 7, 2003
Scored 3/5
Vote
(5)
Vampires (1998)
Carpenter finishes career coffin.
Oct 3, 2003
Scored 1/5
Vote
(5)
Astronaut's Wife, The (1999)
'Rosemary's Alien'.
Oct 3, 2003
Scored 2/5
Vote
(4)
Bram Stoker's Dracula (1992)
Keanu's accent really sucks.
Oct 3, 2003
Scored 1/5
Vote
(4)
Bring It On (2000)
Dunst shakes her pom-poms.
Aug 9, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(4)
Fear And Loathing In Las Vegas (1998)
Men take vacation, drugs.
Aug 9, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(4)
Singin' In The Rain (1952)
Kelly makes Reynolds wet.
Nov 25, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(4)
Two Girls And A Guy (1997)
Heather Graham goes Downey.
Aug 7, 2003
Scored 4/5
Vote
(4)
American Pie (1999)
Virgin beds experimental flutist.
Aug 8, 2003
Scored 4/5
Vote
(3)
Appartement, L' (1996)
Le Hitchcock.
Oct 5, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(3)
Barbarella (1968)
Fonda shags, saves universe.
Aug 7, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(3)
Chaplin (1992)
Junkie plays tramp perfectly.
Oct 3, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(3)
Once Upon A Time In Mexico (2003)
Three arms, no eyes.
Oct 2, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(3)
Planet Of The Apes (2001)
Sensitive study of bestiality.
Aug 9, 2003
Scored 4/5
Vote
(3)
Star Trek: Generations (1994)
Shatner boredly goes.
Aug 6, 2003
Scored 1/5
Vote
(3)
Swingers (1996)
'Diner' for Tarantino generation.
Aug 5, 2003
Scored 4/5
Vote
(3)
X2 (2003)
Cumming mutates into German.
Aug 5, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(3)
Air America (1990)
Downey against drug dealing?
Oct 3, 2003
Scored 4/5
Vote
(2)
Am�lie (2001)
French Hepburn becomes altruist.
Oct 2, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(2)
Angel Heart (1987)
Rouke discovers DEEP south.
Oct 2, 2003
Scored 4/5
Vote
(2)
Buffalo Soldiers (2001)
Fire doesn't kill Pheonix.
Aug 7, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(2)
Citizen Kane (1941)
Man loses sled, morals.
Aug 5, 2003
Scored 4/5
Vote
(2)
Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon (2000)
Ang refutes gravity law.
Aug 5, 2003
Scored 4/5
Vote
(2)
Dead Man (1995)
Dead accountant befriends indian.
Sep 17, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(2)
Dead Ringers (1988)
Gynacologists share client's vagina.
Aug 8, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(2)
Deer Hunter, The (1978)
Man kills deer, self.
Aug 8, 2003
Scored 4/5
Vote
(2)
Edward Scissorhands (1990)
Misfit makes topiary trendy.
Aug 5, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(2)
Fifth Element, The (1997)
Future's bright, future's orange.
Oct 2, 2003
Scored 4/5
Vote
(2)
Gift, The (2000)
Katie reveals lovely gifts.
Sep 26, 2003
Scored 4/5
Vote
(2)
Great Rock 'n' Roll Swindle, The (1980)
McLaren disappears up ass.
Aug 9, 2003
Scored 2/5
Vote
(2)
Hulk (2003)
Ang further rejects physics.
Aug 4, 2003
Scored 1/5
Vote
(2)
Hunt For Red October, The (1990)
Name's Bond. Vladamir Bond.
Aug 7, 2003
Scored 2/5
Vote
(2)
King Kong (1933)
Manhattan visit ends disastrously.
Aug 7, 2003
Scored 4/5
Vote
(2)
MASH (1970)
Military surgeons' cutting satire.
Aug 7, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(2)
Matrix, The (1999)
Philosophical mobile phone advert.
Aug 6, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(2)
Metropolis (1927)
Bi-planes in future. Visionary?
Oct 2, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(2)
Mystery Train (1989)
Buscemi clashes with Strummer.
Sep 26, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(2)
Naked Lunch (1991)
Man talks to typewriters.
Aug 5, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(2)
Nightmare On Elm Street, A (1984)
Depp swallowed by bed.
Oct 3, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(2)
Pitch Black (2000)
Cast kept in dark.
Oct 11, 2003
Scored 4/5
Vote
(2)
Planet Of The Apes (1968)
NRA spokesman condemns violence?
Sep 26, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(2)
Repulsion (1965)
'Home Alone' for adults.
Oct 5, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(2)
Rocky Horror Picture Show, The (1975)
Sarandon Currys transvestite's favour.
Nov 25, 2003
Scored 3/5
Vote
(2)
Suspiria (1977)
'Fame' meets 'The Exorcist'.
Nov 25, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(2)
Young Frankenstein (1974)
Wonka attempts re-animation.
Nov 25, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(2)
Abyss, The (1989)
Aliens resolve marital differences.
Aug 6, 2003
Scored 4/5
Vote
(1)
Adaptation. (2002)
Scriptwriter plays with himself.
Nov 17, 2006
Scored 4/5
Vote
(1)
Agent Cody Banks (2003)
Malcolm in a muddle.
Aug 5, 2003
Scored 2/5
Vote
(1)
Alien (1979)
Ripley battles monster phallus.
Aug 5, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Aliens (1986)
Sigourney mistaken for man.
Nov 25, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Annie Hall (1977)
Walken's scary walk-on.
Aug 8, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Austin Powers: International Man Of Mystery (1997)
'Casino Royale', only funny.
Aug 8, 2003
Scored 4/5
Vote
(1)
Batman Returns (1992)
Batman fights penguin, emotions.
Aug 5, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Blade Runner (1982)
Ford battles robots, conscience.
Aug 7, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Charlie's Angels (2000)
Angels kick, shake ass.
Aug 4, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle (2003)
Angels uphold justice, cleavage.
Aug 7, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Commando (1985)
Arnold battles kidnappers, plausibility.
Oct 3, 2003
Scored 1/5
Vote
(1)
Cube (1997)
Maths saves autistic boy.
Aug 9, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Deconstructing Harry (1997)
Bergman + cock jokes.
Oct 2, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Devils, The (1971)
Reed burns, Redgrave masterbates.
Aug 7, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Dr. T And The Women (2000)
Gynecologist explores women.
Aug 7, 2003
Scored 4/5
Vote
(1)
Fly, The (1986)
Scientist attempts insect politics.
Oct 4, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Girl, Interrupted (1999)
Imprisoned Winona steals show
Oct 4, 2003
Scored 3/5
Vote
(1)
Godfather: Part III, The (1990)
Sofia joins family business.
Oct 3, 2003
Scored 1/5
Vote
(1)
Haine, La (1995)
Amelie's boyfriend directs masterpiece.
Aug 7, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Irr�versible (2002)
Revenge, then rape.
Oct 3, 2003
Scored 4/5
Vote
(1)
Jaws (1975)
Shark can't kill friendship.
Aug 5, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Kill Bill: Vol. 1 (2003)
Killer sword, freaky feet.
Nov 25, 2003
Scored 4/5
Vote
(1)
Lost Highway (1997)
Pullman loses wife, mind.
Aug 5, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Luzhin Defence, The (2000)
Turturro 'pawns' over Watson.
Sep 26, 2003
Scored 4/5
Vote
(1)
Metropolis (2001)
Movie predicts jazz revival.
Oct 2, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Mulholland Drive (2001)
Logic gets a Lynching.
Aug 6, 2003
Scored 4/5
Vote
(1)
Performance (1970)
Jagger plays washed-out rocker.
Nov 25, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Pirates Of The Caribbean: The Curse Of The Black Pearl (2003)
Depp, Rush: Overactors Anonymous.
Oct 3, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Rules Of Attraction, The (2002)
Dawson gets role reversal.
Aug 6, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Spider-Man (2002)
Museum visit creates super-hero.
Aug 5, 2003
Scored 4/5
Vote
(1)
X-Men (2000)
Mutants develop 'sexy' gene.
Aug 5, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
10 (1979)
Dudley gets on tits.
Aug 8, 2003
Scored 2/5
Vote
Alien� (1992)
Alien fights convict's club.
Aug 8, 2003
Scored 2/5
Vote
Arlington Road (1999)
Terrorist intrigues, kills neighbour.
Aug 7, 2003
Scored 4/5
Vote
Back To The Future (1985)
Time traveller's oedipal nightmare.
Aug 9, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
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